How $DYKE spends her day:

walks (very slowly) to the local feminist bookstore

tweets at Elon Musk

accidentally sits on her own dog

calls out things that are "problematic"

wipes the grease off of her face with flannel shirt

makes sure armpit hair is visible

2x McDoubles (twice daily as prescribed)

plays nintendo switch at the DMV

replaces blown out leggings

blocks the road with her Subaru to protest climate change